19 April 2008

Seaside tide (д начинает движение)..

Nii.. so.. somewhat due for a clearing of my 'status' in some sense of the word here Eestis. Although 'clearing' implies clear visibility and a lack of obstructions, whereas the real situation is closer to being upside down at a 144 degree angle in a New Guinean jungle that is on meth and crack and pop rocks (the jungle, that is). Time for a figurative slash and burn.

It'd be interesting to see how many of the words in the last few sentences would pop up in Federal security scans.. probably just 'jungle', 'New', and 'rocks' if I was to guess. Which I am.

I've heard many eestlased (Eesti-people) here talk with wide Christmas-morning eyes about how the landscape and substance of the area has changed over the last 17 years. I can only imagine. Which is similar to my guessing, and I have already demonstrated how complete of a picture that produces. Really though, from what I gather it is an entirely different place (well, maybe not in Kopli, where the bum-perishing-in-fire rate is at about 4.2 per day given the right conditions). All aside though, and even given the major changes which have brought it into the EU and thrown into motion this complex and surprising e-government system (they are amazed that those in the States actually have to file taxes and are given the freedom and, importantly, trust to report how much they make.. here it is all pre-calculated and just a click).. all of the changes are just as balanced by the ridiculous remnants and even backward motion in some other departments. As in, näiteks (for example), say, aaahhh.. mm.. Kodakondsus- ja Migratsiooniametis (Citizenship and Migration Board). To be fair, I have only experienced the Migratsiooni part of the office (which isn't important enough to be a ministry, but is on the same level as the border guards, heritage department, and the 'Rescue Board', just to put this all into perspective). I've heard of people getting their passport in a day after proving their grandparents were citizens of the first Estonian Republic (Eesti Vabariik). This is, of course, worlds different than a young US citizen with a double-major bachelor degree from a large institution, a grip on multiple languages (including the one used locally), extensive work experience and.. rarest of all, the actual knowledge of and will to live in and contribute to Eesti. Worlds apart (separate ways? That's it! This is all a riddle! I just need to grow a mustache and play a keyboard on a wall..).

So, possibly in light of a lack of attention during reforms or a fierce sometimes-exclusionist nationalist mindset, the migration process here is still.. and many eestlased would stab me with a bowling ball for saying this.. however it is still very much Soviet. I began to notice this when opening a bank account. Much is based in paradox; you can check balances using your phone, rely entirely upon the online banking system, transfer funds anywhere for payment of anything.. yet.. when you need to get the basics done, you are given at least (and this is not an exaggeration) eight different carbon-copy stamped, signed and dated (emphasis on the 'stamped' part) yellow sheets of paper. I'm now having major issues with the government over the fact that I wasn't given similar parallel documents in the States when I worked for places, cut my first tooth, and for each tongue slip made during PDA in a park summer of 2004.

KMA Officer: So this is your CV?
Adam: Jah. On küll. (Yes, certainly is.)
O: You have written that you worked at this place in 2001.. what did you do before that?
A: I.. was in high and primary school.
O: Aahh, ok write that down, please.
A: ..olgu. (Alright).
O: And everything before that.
A: Mmmm.. what?
O: What did you do?
A: .....
O: Just write down everything, starting from when you were born.
A: .....

Written: 1986 - 1991: Lived.

O: Aitäh! (Thanks!)
A: .....

I literally had to think and count back the years before I was in lapseaed (lapse:child, aed: garden). Again, that is not exaggerated and is close to word by word. If anything, I'm angered by the fact that it would be hard for me to make something like that up. Even reality trumped me there. Shit.

To break from the ranting if anything (for anyone who has survived the negative onslaught to this point.. juice and vodka break all around!) A few русские девушки (russkie devushki, Russian girls) from Peters came for a few days last week, and it was really.. revitalizing. One way in the sense that I feel after it that I could manage living in Russia for a short time (few months). Whereas Eestis it takes, on average, four years and 3.2 assorted kidneys (I'm really going for the Federal search now!) to become 'friends' with eestlased (defined as: they mention what they are doing after work), I became decently close with the girls over three days. Even more enocouraging, the entirety of those days took place in Russian. I'm not fully fluent by any standard, but it is a foundation and something I was really excited that I was able to manage and.. moreso.. enjoy! Just.. thoughts. Nearing a vodka break once more?

This is far from complete (what isn't). The next week will see some wild developments (according to the calendar). Upheavals, possibly. Revisions (- is optional). Viations (de?) Сюда(от)? Да(ту)? More '.'s to replace the upturned sentences.

Edasi..

17 April 2008

Откуда, куда..

First off, a disclaimer that this post is far from informative or even relevant to anything. So, in line with most of the rest.

I am still "here" and have not (yet) been thrown (or kicked) into any Soviet-era forced labour camps (though you can see one from my flat!).. given, saying this with any certainty is a stretch and given the daily instability of anything here, the next post might just as well come from some 'reformed' gulag in Novosibirsk, interspersed with me breaking out into literary song.. "Soiuz nerushimy, respublik svobodnykh.." I'll soon get calls and messages to those who are checking up, and I would encourage that to continue! Just need a bit of a break from my actual paid labour camp..

Wanted to make sure to mention though; people are everywhere. Really, they are. Not just people, though. People that fate deems to mix into life to either inspire you, or give you a playful kidney punch.

Case Study:

I was sitting in the cafe yesterday following a 10(something) hour day, conversing with an Esto-Russian girl, She mentioned something about how she has this odd desire to visit Texas (Russian: Tikhas) one day and how 'entrancing' the accent is there. Obviously, this presented me with an opportunity to throw in some 'yee-ha's and to, in my most grandly offensive Southwest US impersonation, talk about trucks and dogs and obesity (as a sidenote, hearing it somehow actually reinforced her interest in the dialect.. I suppose that is somewhat like me and Russian though..).

Just about to where I got to "..driive around the 'hai-wayy and beat my wiife, 'cause that's awhat we do in Texxass..", I was also complemented on how good of an impression it was from.. yes.. the Texan woman standing in line five inches away from me in Tallinn, Estonia. Alllllright! She wasn't offended of course.. being one of the few people from the state who have ever been to Estonia and having learned to drop the accent herself. However, recalled the need to realize that.. there are people everywhere.

Therefore, do your cowboy impressions louder when in obscure countries. The people might not always be five inches away, and you're going to have to shout if they are going to hear you and have such an awkwardd encounter.

Edasi..